Honor lost, Honor found

Is it possible to regain honor through honorable pursuits? I hope so, for a very long time I was without honor, I was an addict who was active in his addiction, I was a drug dealer and a loan shark among many other things. I hope that I have regained my honor. Honor is the most important virtue in Bushido, and I do my best to study and live by the code. I do my best to teach my son what it is to be a good person and to live an honorable life, but there are nights when I lie awake remembering the things I have done and wonder if I can really teach Rowan what it is to be honorable. for the most part I have put my past away and move forward with my life but I know I need to remember the mistakes I made so I'll not make them again. Life is funny that way, we need to leave the past behind us but yet we need the past to help us navigate our future.

Rowan is by far the most important person in my life and as much as a child wants their parents approval, the parents also want the approval of their children. I hope Rowan sees the person I am now and can accept the person I once was without bias. I know we will clash from time to time, he will get rebellious and fight with me ( I did with my father ) but in the end like me I hope he sees his dad for who he really is inside. My father is a wonderful man, we still argue now and then, but I love him with every fiber of my being. My dad is a good man who did his best in raising his kids, and I see now what I thought was old fashioned was really morals.

If I have regained my honor then I can rest assure that I can teach these things to Rowan and he can pass them on to his children.